Big purchase weekend

You'd think we were made of money the way we were spending it this weekend!

Well the one purchase is something that we had budgeted for. We bought ourselves a brand new patio set! I tried to find pictures online from the Lowes website, but no such luck. I will have to try and snap one tomorrow. When Andre and I were living at my grandmother's house the one thing we loved was sitting out in the backyard in the summer enjoying our meal. We're really looking forward to being able to do this in our own home this coming summer.

Our second purchase was a total want of mine, this was a "treat":

For those of you that have been living under a rock for an extremely long time this is the Nintendo Wii. I thought that it might get Andre and I out of the sit-down-and-watch-tv-till-bedtime-rut that we have been in for what seems like forever. It's worked at least one night.

Tonight we played two games of bowling before I tried my hand at boxing, and won! The fun lasted until I came back into the rec room from the changing over the laundry to find Mikey our cat sprawled out on a table sleeping and Andre sleeping on the couch. Oh how I wish I could've taken a picture!

So we'll see how often Andre uses it. I think the boxing alone will serve as wonderful therapy after a frustrating day at work for me. He has been talking about checking out the different types of games they have, so I think that the Wii will grow on him eventually over time.

The Business of Being Born

A friend of mine is a doula and offered to let me borrow her copy when she heard that I had never seen it before. Now I am in the healthcare field, and have many friends who are parents so I consider myself fairly informed of the different options out there when it comes to giving birth.

This movie was a huge eye opener for me. I know that a homebirth isn't everyone's cup of tea (not mine either---a little too "granola" for me), but I think this movie should be a must see for all couples out there who are expecting a baby, or those people out there that are considering having a child. I think quite a few people out there think there is only one way to give birth, and this can't be farther from the truth.

A very good documentary. To view the trailer click on the following:

A talk with my mother

So I was out with my mother on Sunday (as I am almost every Sunday) and I had to start griping about our stupid doctor's office and their new policy on no longer pre-booking appointments. That led to me telling my mother about why I was calling to book an appointment. I don't know why I did. Maybe I feel like I should, maybe I'm just a wierdo, who knows.
So I tell my mother that I was calling the doctor because I need to talk to them about why the hell I bleed every single farking time Andre and I have sex (that, and the fact that I've only ovulated once in seven months). It's been happening since I went off the pill about 7 months ago. I know, you're probably yelling at the computer screen as you read this, but I kept thinking it would stop. It didn't, in fact it's gotten worse. It's put a damper on our sex life to say the least.
So, like I was saying, I told my mother. Then I told her that I was talking to some friends and they questioned whether it could be Endometriosis, or Cysts. Both of which have popped into my brain. Then out of the blue, she tells me that she has/had Endo. (Insert why-the-fark-didn't-you-tell-me-about-this-earlier face here) My aunt also has it. My grandmother and great-grandmother also had complete hysterectomies before they were 50. We don't know why though.
So who knows what happens from here. I plan on calling my doctors office on June 8th, on my next day off to book an appointment to get this ball rolling. I don't know what they will or won't do, but I would like to have some answers. Most of all if we're going to have a bitch of a time trying to have a child later on down the road I would like to know sooner rather than later.

Confession time

I've been using night cream since my 30th birthday. Shhhhh, don't tell anyone!

Yummy lemon lime cupcakes

I have a subscription to Canadian Living magazine. The May 2009 issue arrived with cupcakes on the cover. YUMMMMMY! Now I was just waiting for a occasion to make some. My opportunity arrived with Mother's Day, or in our case, Mother's Day on the May long weekend. Here is the recipe:















Lemon Lime Cupcakes
1/2 cup butter, softened
3/4 cup granulated sugar
2 eggs
1 tbsp each grated lemon and lime rind*
1/2 tsp lemon juice
1 1/4 cup all-purpose flour
1 tsp baking powder
1/4 tsp baking powder
1/4 tsp salt
3/4 cup milk

(*I used the rind of one lemon and one lime. The lemon is easier to grate for the rind. My grandmother asked what the black things were in the cupcakes, so I think I will just use the lemon rind next time.)

In a large bowl, beat butter with granulated sugar until fluffy; beat in eggs, 1 at a time. Beat in lemon and lime rinds and lemon juice.
In separate bowl, whisk together flour, baking powder and salt; stir into butter mixture alternately with milk, making 3 additions of dry ingredients and 2 of the milk. Spoon into paper-lined or greased muffin cups*.
(* I ended up filling them almost 3/4 of the way full, and they didn't rise over the edge of the muffin tin.)
Bake in 350 degree oven until cake tester inserted in centre come out clean, 20 to 25 minutes. Transfer to rack; let cool.

Butter Icing
3/4 cup butter, softened (I ran out of butter and used 1/2 cup butter, 1/4 cup becel margarine, it was fine)
3 3/4 cup icing sugar
2 tbsp milk
1 1/2 tsp vanilla

In bowl beat butter until light; beat in sugar, 1/2 cup at a time. beat in milk and vanilla. Makes about 2 1/2 cups, which the magazine said was enough for 12 cupcakes, I found I had quite a bit leftover. I tinted it with some yellow paste colouring.

I woke up on the wrong side of the bed

I don't know what is wrong with me today. I am being such a crabby bitch. I was snapping at my sisters, snapping at co-workers, snapping at Andre. I am in such a foul mood I told him there was to be no talking in the car on the way home from work tonight.
I honestly don't know what has gotten into me today. Here's hoping tomorrow will be a much better day!

Why do some women like assholes?

I ask this because I have a couple friends right now who seem to have an unbelievable attraction to them. It's like they just can't stop themselves.

One in particular has been with him and then apart from him then with him, etc, etc, for almost six years. She wants to get married and have children. He doesn't want to get married, and we're unsure that he could even father a child (fertility issues with first wife). He's an emotionally stunted individual who is always deflecting his own insecurities and shortcomings on my friend instead of just admitting to the world he's a fuck-head.

The latest addition to his assholishness is the fact that he wants to get in my friends pants. I know, I know, what straight male doesn't want to get in some woman's pants but he refuses to wear a condom. I don't know why my friend would even consider having sex with this idiot, but she is. Her only condition is that he bags it, and he won't.

Just yesterday she's telling me this latest development, and she's asking me if it's okay that she refused to have sex with him because of this. I told her of course it's okay that she refused to have sex with him, and that most women would make him be tested for STD's, never mind just wearing a condom! The best part is that she was telling her sister and her sister asked her "why are you so hung up about this?" Hello? So you want your sister to go and have sex with this man not knowing who (or how many) he's been having sex with since they broke up almost two years ago? Considering he was cheating on her before their break-up, I would think that my friend is completely justified in being "hung up about this".

Even as I sit here typing this I still cannot wrap my brain around the fact that my friend was even thinking about taking this man back into her life. He has done nothing but treat her like crap. He's constantly playing mind games, talking down to her, and she continues to second guess herself, thinking that maybe he will change and she could have the life that she's always wanted. I just don't understand.

Moments like this I am so unbelievably grateful for having Andre in my life. For all the times that I want to scream because he's driving me crazy, I know how blessed I am to have him in my life. He tells me how beautiful I am everyday, even when I think I look like crap. He never leaves for work without telling me he loves me. I am blessed to be sharing my life with such a wonderful man.

I just wish that my friend would realize that she's worthy of having that in her life too, and that she's not going to get that from this loser. Here's hoping this time she will really end things with him.

My laugh for the day

I was surfing the net today and came across this little video. Is it wrong that it reminded me of my bestfriend? (and it reminds me of my bestfriend in a not so good way?)

Sad

I was bored, and checking something on my sisters profile on Facebook when I read something that made me sad. We have a cousin. My uncle is not is biological father, but had helped raise him since he was four. Well my uncle and my cousins mother split up a few years ago. It was messy, it still is messy. My uncle had a break down last summer and the shit really hit the fan after that.

A few months ago I noticed that my cousin took me off his MSN contact list, as well as off his Facebook "friends" list. I figured he had his reasons and left it at that. I have sent a few e-mails off since then, and received very polite short responses.

Then tonight I read some comments that he left on Facebook. Stupid one sided conversations on Facebook. This is what has made me sad:

Cousin: i know but there's some peopl I don't want to see and I'm sure they've been dragging my name through the fucking mud sence september and I'm guessing they dont want me there either which is fine. you're the only one there I really got along with besides other uncle's family.

Aside from the absolutely atrocious spelling and lack of grammar which would make anyone sad, I feel so horrible that he feels this way about all of us. Well, aside from my sister apparently. I don't know how he could think that we would talk about him in a bad light, and "drag his name through the mud". He's a kid for heaven's sake! (18 this summer) How could I talk badly about a child? I can't help but wonder the influence that his mother has had in all of this, and how she has manipulated how he feels about the family that welcomed the two of them in 14 years ago, and treated him like he had always been part of the family.

He graduates from High School in June. He's always been such a good student. I truly wish him the best in whatever he choses to do. It's a shame that I won't be able to tell him that in person.

A disaster waiting to happen

I have a friend who just bought a house with her boyfriend. Happy news normally, but with this friend I have this sneaking suspicion that it's a disaster waiting to happen. This is because it is the same friend who was "accidentally on purpose" trying to get pregnant.

You may have remembered my post a while back about this girl. Her step-father decided to give her a chunk of cash. A large chunk of cash, with the hopes that she would use it to buy a home. She's in her early thirties, and currently renting so this would give her the in that she needed to get on the property ladder. Well she decided to buy a house with her boyfriend. The same boyfriend that won't share his work schedule with her even after two years together. The same boyfriend who can't have a serious talk about their relationship without being drunk or on MSN (!!!). The same boyfriend who after an argument with her will just not talk to her for a week. You get where I'm going with this.

She's a co-worker of mine also and all of us girls at work (we're all friends outside of work as well) have been trying to get her to be cautious. To be careful of her investment and sign an agreement protecting her investment, as she's providing the entire down payment on the house. She broached the subject with him and he flipped. He took her apartment keys off his key ring and gave them back to her, and told her that he didn't want to "do this" and more. I forgot to mention that she has major daddy issues.

(The Coles notes version is that her dad skipped out on her and mom, grew up just her and her mother. She has a very low self-esteem. Long string of highly dysfunctional relationships with men. This current dysfunctional relationship is the most functional of them all.)

So the thought of living without him was too much for her and she decided that she would do whatever it took to keep him in her life, and she agrees to purchase the home with him without an agreement. So now he will own half of a home even though all the equity is hers alone, and they will both be on the title. He could leave her next month, and get 50% of the sale of the house. It's a mess.

All of us have tried to get her to see how unhealthy this relationship is, but it's all been for nothing. She's admitted that she's had doubts about the relationship, but refuses to do anything about it. The boyfriend knows how badly she wants the marriage, the house, and kids that he manipulates her every chance he gets. After one discussion about commitment, he went as far as to compare their relationship with the one Andre and I have. He told her that Andre may have loved me enough to buy me a ring and marry me, but he loves her more than Andre loves me. Yeah, I know. She announced this to everyone at lunch one day, everyone kind of just sat with their mouths open, speechless.

Needless to say this "profession of love" kept my friend going for months and months. She's 4 years older than I am and desperately wants what Andre and I have, and he knew this. Everyone can see the writing on the wall except for her. Most of the time I alternate between wanting to hug her and shake her and make her see what is going on.

I see what is going on and how badly this could all go for her, but like anything you can't make someone see something they don't want to see. I just have to step back, and pray for the best.

A loss

My mother came running over to the house last night to give me some news. Our old landlord had passed. He had been struggling with host vs graft disease for many years following two bone marrow treatments to cure his leukemia. He had lost so much weight and with that the strength and energy that was his trademark. One thing that the disease could not take away from him was his quick wit and strength of will. Over the years there were many times that his family and friends gathered around preparing for his loss. Each time, including one very close call just this winter, everyone waited by their phones and e-mails waiting for the worst.

Regardless of all the differences that Andre and I might have had with them as landlords, he was an amazing person, and a testament to the human spirit when dealing with such a debilitating disease. Our comfort now is knowing that his body is finally free. Free of the pain, free of the weakness that had been with him for so long. I feel badly for his almost 2 year old grandson, and his yet unborn great grandchild, for they will never truly get to know this amazing person.

RIP Bill.